Thursday, February 17, 2011

Fanaticism is Bad

Have you ever known somebody who was obsessed with something? I don't mean the kind of person that has a bunch of one band's albums, or has an extensive collection of one genre of movies in their room, or the person that decides to start liking a sport once the last game of the season rolls around.

I'm talking about the kind of person who has every single album, every EP, every single, every b-side track, every DVD of a band. They have posters and t-shirts, and can rattle off the year every song was produced, knows all the hobbies, favorite drinks and birthdays of all of the band members, and will continuously talk about every single little band fun-fact to the point where they don't become fun anymore.

I'm talking about the kind of person who's walls, ceiling, desktop background, facebook photo album, cellphone case, bed sheets, toothbrush, folders, pens and pencils, binders, t-shirts, jewelry, book shelf and DVD case are all related to one individual and the movie franchise that he drives solely based on his moderately above average looks.

I'm talking, albeit to a much lesser extent, about the kind of person that quite literally created a shrine devoted to his favorite film series, complete with the DVDs, one of which has a collector's edition screaming book of the dead case, posters, musical playbills, the comics that continue the series, action figures, and a chainsaw similar to the one used throughout the series to top it all off.

These kind of people, ladies and gentlemen, are the type of people that ruin our world. People don't get obsessed about normal things. I don't know a single person who's addicted to grocery shopping. People get obsessed about weird stuff that only they like. And drugs I guess. Some people get obsessed with drugs. But that's a topic for another blog.

Right now I'm talking about people that get obsessed over weird stuff that only they care about. It's particularly destructive to our universe because, currently, everything revolves around social networking. With facebook and tweeter and tumblr and livejournal and every other site, people have the opportunity to spread their wealth of knowledge and opinions and diversity across the world, creating a more unified and connected existence.

Except those damn fanatics. All they can do is talk about Edward Cullen or Justin Bieber or Ke$ha or Channing Tatum or whatever they hell they freak out about. Every post is a quote from a movie or a song or something, and they post a lot. The worst is when they upload pictures. Entire albums chock foll of hundreds of images of celebrities with girls' faces poorly photoshopped next to them. Stop being such a pre-teen girl. At least make the picture look believable, I know dogs that can photoshop better than that.

Originally, it wasn't my intention to write about this, but it irks me too much to avoid. People that are obsessed with a normal person. Not like a celebrity. Usually, it's an ex. And they just can't seem to stop making statuses about them. The target of these statuses is probably blatantly aware of every single thing that is being said at them, and yet the posts never stop. They're always something like "You promised you'd never break my heart, way to be a heartless liar." Every single day, you can count on this person posting some random, annoying status about the boy that crushed them and how they'll get get over it. BUT THEY NEVER DO. If they were getting over it, they'd probably stop talking about them rather than posting statuses EVERY SINGLE DAY. That's not getting over it, that's wallowing. And wallowing is pathetic, annoying and should be done in private, not for all of facebook.

Sorry, I probably shouldn't check my news feed in the middle of writing blogs. Anyway, I've had a moment of introspection, right after I took a brief writing break to watch some improv comedy, and it has changed my entire belief system. I apologize to those of you that read this far thinking I was going to damn weird obsessions to a watery grave. Instead, I'm damning the extensive use of social networking to a watery grave, or as terrible of a grave as a blog that nobody reads can do.

So stop using facebook to spread your poorly photoshopped pictures of your face on Kristen Stewart's body caught between Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner. Create a photobucket account and just give your friends the links in a personal message, because the rest of the world really doesn't want to see that. Stop using twitter altogether because if you can say it in 140 characters, is it really even worth saying? Stop with the inane crap and the pointless, worthless nonsense nobody wants to hear. And, if you can't refrain yourself from being a waste of digital space, at least use your privacy settings. You can control who sees what and who doesn't. Please, spare me.

What I'm trying to say is that obsessions are fine. Everybody gets obsessive. It would be foolish to write an entire post about how bad obsessions are considering you can't avoid them. Out of those three scenarios above, one of them is specifically about me, and at one point I was well on my way to becoming the living representation of another. I get obsessed.

To be perfectly honest, I'd probably follow a select few people to the ends of the Earth. If Sam Raimi told me he needs my personal help funding his next film, I'd say "Point me to the nearest bank," as I steal my father's handgun and don a ski mask. If Frank Darabont told me he wanted a real corpse rather than a prop for a scene in The Walking Dead, I'd stab my own best friend in the heart. If Christopher Nolan told me that I was really dreaming and the only way to wake up would be to jump off a bridge, I'd be a little bit skeptical as to whether he was Christopher Nolan or just a clever forger, but I'd probably jump off that bridge.


We all have our weird obsessions, the point is that we keep them to ourselves, because if we spread our infatuations across the world or the network or wherever, at best we meet one or two people that agree and annoy our other hundreds of friends, and at the worst, we look like we need a psychiatrist because we've admitted we'd rob banks and kill others as well as ourselves just because we look up to someone.

HI THERE

HI!
Anselm of Canterbury here, and I'm gonna sell you on the existence of God in 9 simple steps!
First things first, let's define God!
God is the being than which none greater is possible.
By greater I mean superior to or better than.
In my book Wisdom and Moral goodness are great-making qualities!

The second thing we need to straighten out is Things that exist in reality, things which don't exist in reality, possible things, impossible things, and things that exist in the understanding.
Examples are the easiest way to sort these out.
Things that exist in reality: dogs, televisions, trees
Things that don't exist in reality: the fountain of youth, Santa Claus, unicorns
Possible things: Santa Claus, Unicorns. (Just because they don't exist doesn't mean it's impossible that they could.)
Things that exist in the understanding: Basically anything you can imagine.
Things that don't exist in the understanding: a four sided triangle or a three sided square, things that have never been thought of that may exist, and things that have never been thought of that don't exist.

Whew, OKAY! Now that we've handled those little disclaimers, lets get the the meat an' potatos of this discussion.

1. God exists in the understanding.
2. God might have existed in reality. (God is a possible being.)
3. If God exists only in the understanding, but might have existed in reality, then he might have been greater than he is.
4. Suppose God exists only in the understanding.
5. God might have been greater than he is. (2, 4, & 3)
6. God is a being than which a greater is possible. (5)
7.  God is a being which none greater is possible.
8. It is false that God exists only in the understanding. (4 - 7)
9. God exists in reality as well as in the understanding. (1, 8)

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Dreams

 I had been meaning to write something on this topic for several weeks. I feel there has bee a string of recurring concepts in my dreams that make them odd even by dream standards. At first I attributed it to odd sleeping habits, then watching weird shows before bed. Now I have no Idea.

The first one occurred in December over winter break. I had stayed up just about all night playing madden and passed out around 10am. I slept for just about 2 hours, yet in that two hours this occurred:
 I'm in my backyard, only it isn't my back yard. It looks like my backyard but where my neighbor's fence usually is is now rolling landscapes peppered with large pine trees. I imagine this is how Montana would look. The next thing I know me and Brad are walking through the woods. I'm holding a map that leads us to the secret. What the secret is, I don't know, I suppose that's why it's a secret. Suddenly from no where: Bear attack. Bears everywhere. Not the New Jersey black bears either, Canadian, I'll eat you and your family, bears, big bears, bear cavalry bears. We both run. I make it back to my kitchen and from the window over the sink I see Brad still in the yard. Trapped between the jaws of a massive grizzly, slowly being ripped to pieces. The bear stands in the tree line looking right at me, almost mocking me by taking my friend's life.

At this point I smelled someone making bacon, and that was enough of a kick to send me out of my dream and into the real world with a sense of 'the fuck just happend' and 'Oh man, I'm starving.'

The next several weeks I don't remember in such detail, but there are definitely two common themes: More bears, dead hookers and dead ex-girlfriends.

This morning I suddenly found myself in the building I have most of my classes in, only it wasn't that building, it was the main entrance of my high school. I see my ex girlfriend walk in, ex-a for all intents and purposes. The thing about her was after we broke up she insisted on trying to be my friend. Now, I never understood this concept that girls have, but for my own personal coping methods, when a girl broke up with me I just cut off that whole portion of my life. Anything we both were into, any friends I made because of her, whatever, just, gone so I wouldn't have to think about it. So, seeing her in class everyday for an entire year and having to deal with her trying to play nice and everything got old fast.

So ex-a walks into the room and instantly sees me. It's as if I can hear the tracking computer in her head go 'target acquired.' I instantly take evasive action, into the stairwell. Now the building has the stair case for my dorm and I'm damn near sprinting up multiple floors. (missing frames) I'm in her room talking to her, only it's not my ex-girlfriend, it's a hybrid of my ex and current girlfriend (missing frames) My sister sees me talking to her. I need to get her. This cannot be spoken of. She'll rat me out for sure. I try and chase her down before she can get to the telportation portal. (missing frames) My hybrid girlfriend is dead. I'm dragging her body somewhere, a feeling of desperation creeping over me. My alarm goes off, I wake up with the feeling 'God dammit, I need a dream interperter.'

If my brain were to release a greatest hits CD of my dreams it'd be called "Hookers, Bears, and Girlfriends: the life and times of Tim."